Hey, Readerland. Day 4 is here and I am ready to get started.
So, no writing group today, as two of our four members were unable to make it. Kind of a bummer, but I still have lots to work on before January 1st. I'll probably end up sending it to the publisher as early as possible, but I also want to make the story as good as I can before submission. That's one of those balance things that I'm not really good at.
Anyway, enough of the jibber jabber and onto the challenge. To refresh your memory, today's topic is:
14. Capture the moment of redemption for a truly terrible villain. Why and how does it come?
Okay, so this one might be a bit tougher than the ones I've done before, so it might end up taking more than the 15 minutes. Or, if it's working well, I might keep going after the 15 minutes is over. Hard to tell. Time to hit it.
"Stop, McCarthy! I won't warn you again!" Bronski's hand hovered near his gun.
McCarthy couldn't stop laughing. "Detective Bronski! So nice to see you again!" He doubled over, the bloody carving knife dangling from his hand.
"McCarthy, we know it was you! Drop the knife! Do it now!" Bronski's hand was on his gun grip and he prayed he didn't need to draw the gun.
"Of course it was me, Detective! Who else would it be?" McCarthy asked. "I was the only link between the eleven of them! I knew you would catch me. Not you specifically, of course, but the police. Not that I haven't had a ton of fun with you, Detective!" He fell into another laughing fit.
Bronski moved a few steps closer. He was within a dozen yards. He wasn't young enough or fast enough anymore to cover that distance before McCarthy used that knife on him. "Talk to me, McCarthy. Why the women? The children? You targeted the men. Eleven men. Why?"
"You will call me Eric, Detective, if we're going to continue this conversation." McCarthy slid down into a crouch against the wall behind him.
"Okay, fine." Bronski said. "Eric. I'm Chuck. You can call me Chuck. You want to tell me why you went after those men?"
"The women and children," McCarthy said. "they were just collateral damage, I guess. No, not collateral damage. They were damage inflicted on those sons of bitches! Every single one of them got what he deserved!"
"And what was that?" Bronski asked.
"They deserved to die! After everything they did to me! Everything that they ever did to me! They deserved nothing less than death! But you know what they got?" McCarthy asked pushing himself to his feet.
"What?"
"They got suffering as well as death! I made them suffer!" McCarthy seemed almost lost, visions of his crimes dancing behind his eyes.
"Stabbing someone seventeen times is suffering, I'd say." Bronski said.
McCarthy laughed. "No. Not the stabbing. Each of those guys had a blow to the head, right?"
Bronski nodded.
"Because I hit them with a hammer and knocked them out. Who wouldn't be happy to see an old friend from high school, right? Once their back was turned, boom!" McCarthy pantomimed swinging a hammer. "And then I tied them to chairs. Entire family, each in a chair. Then the fun began."
"Fun?" Bronski asked.
"I made them watch as I tormented their wives. They were helpless to do anything. They begged. They pleaded. But none of it was enough!" McCarthy laughed again, but this time there was tension behind it. "They had to watch as I killed their wives in front of them in turn before turning my knife, this knife," McCarthy said, pointing the knife at Bronski. "on them. Each stab was a revelation! An epiphany!"
Bronski took another couple of steps forward. "And what did you learn from this epiphany?"
"That I was getting closer to freedom!" McCarthy said with a smile. "With them dead and gone, I would be free of everything that they had done to me!"
"What did the do?" Bronski asked.
"I was always the quiet kid in school, right? The one that got pushed around. Shoved into lockers, that kind of thing. Kids stuff. Until one day after school, I'm leaving school when Kevin stops me." McCarthy looked up at the ceiling, tears forming in his eyes.
"Kevin Bates?" Bronski asked.
"Yeah, him. He stops me and asks if I can help him with a problem he has. Stupid me, I assumed he meant homework." McCarthy rubbed his nose. "No, I follow him into the locker room and there they are. All eleven of them. They beat me pretty badly, took my clothes and duct taped me to the goal post, knowing that there was a pep rally the next morning."
Bronski stopped moving and looked at McCarthy.
"I was humiliated!' McCarthy yelled. "In front of the whole school, I was naked and bruised from the beating! And do you know what happened? Everyone laughed. No one helped me down until the faculty arrived! Not a single God damned person in that stadium helped me!"
"Kevin, I'm sorry." Bronski said.
"Don't be sorry, Chuck." McCarthy said. "Be happy! They're all gone and now I'm free for the first time since I was seventeen! Free from the humiliation!"
"But what about the families, Eric? They didn't have anything to do with what happened." Bronski moved closer again.
"Wrong!" McCarthy yelled. "All of those bitches were cheerleaders! Nobody ever moves out of this stupid town! They all marry their high school sweethearts and contribute the inbreeding in this damn dump! Every single one of them got what they deserved!"
Bronski shook his head. "No, Eric. Those children didn't deserve to die. You killed innocent children for revenge. I have to take you in, Eric. Put the knife down and get down on your knees, hands behind your head."
"No...I..." McCarthy started. "I didn't...The children..." He slowly sank to his knees, the knife clattering to the concrete floor.
"Yes, the children, Eric. Think about what you did to them." Bronksi hurried over and pulled McCarthy's hands behind his back, putting the handcuffs on."
"Chuck?" McCarthy asked.
"Yes, Eric?"
"The kids are okay. Roughed up a little bit, but they're okay." McCarthy sounded like a weight had been lifted. "They're at my mama's farm out side of town on Route Eight. They're in the cellar underneath the barn. I haven't hurt them, Chuck. I mean, no more than I had to, just to get them in the cellar."
"Eric, you've hurt them more than you know," Bronski said, walking McCarthy to the police car.
"I just wanted them to be free, Chuck. They deserved freedom, too. Right?" McCarthy didn't sound entirely sure.
Okay, so I'm not sure that counts as 'a moment of redemption' but I like the way it worked out. And it tied into the first story I wrote. I think this took me about 25 minutes total.
Anyway, that's Day 4. I hope you're enjoying everything so far. Remember, you can always join in by leaving your content as a comment or if you have your own blog/webpage/slice of internet awesome, you can leave a link for that as a comment, too. I'm not here to judge, I'm just here to post.
So, what's in store for Day 5? I'm glad you asked. My lovely assistant has drawn:
#25 Write about the worst mistake a character has ever made -- the kind of mistake that resonates
throughout that character's life. The kind where the snake can never be put back into the can.
Now re-write it like that mistake is the best thing that ever happened to the character.
Yikes. Looks like a toughie. No slacking, though. No days off.
That's all for now. Thanks for playing along and I'll see you all tomorrow. Until then, take care and be awesome to each other.
#WWWYKI
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