Hey, Readerland. The Ogre is back once again with another rousing tale of fiction for Day 14 of the Ogre/Chuck Challenge!
Honestly, I'm not sure how I'm going to work today's challenge. It is:
18. Write the unsexiest sex scene you can write. Maybe it's awkward. Maybe both parties are
totally into it but the reader won't be. Maybe it involves some kind of mind-boggling fetish like
people who get erotically charged by Mylar balloons or who dress up like giant teddy bears and
try to bang parked cars.
I can think of things that are unsexy, no doubt about it. However, I want to make it unsexy without being disgusting, because that would be really easy. I mean, a raging case of herpesyphillorrhea, but...ew. Seriously.
Okay, let's try to get this started.
Joseph sat in his office, huddled against the chill that came in through the window. Luckily his hat was deemed acceptable by management or his head would have frozen off already. He rubbed his eyes and tried to focus on the progress report for his project, since he was leading a meeting later on that day. He was just deciding to get a cup of coffee when he heard it.
Zzt. Zzt.
He sucked in a breath and stood up slowly. He knew the sound of corduroy when he heard it. And he liked it. Walking toward the coffee maker, Joseph looked around the cubicle farm, trying to find who was wearing corduroys.
Zzt. Zzt.
He had no idea why but corduroy pants had turned him on since he was barely in adolescence. The sound of them moving back and forth and even stealing a pair of his mother's old corduroys had given him numerous nights of pleasure.
"Hey, Sandy." Joseph said, slipping into her cubicle. "I was wondering if you had that data for me on the QR-14."
"I thought I sent it to you. Let me check again." Sandy aid.
Joseph cocked his head to looked down at Sandy's pants. Slacks. Damn, it wasn't her.
"Huh. I guess I didn't attach the file." Sandy said. "Give me a second."
"Sure thing. Thanks, Sandy." He walked out of her cubicle and continued looking around.
Zzt. Zzt.
It was coming from near the break room.
Poking his head into the break room, he finally found her. Deborah. Deborah was wearing the corduroys. He felt his hand moving toward his crotch, but stopped himself. He didn't know who might catch him.
"Deborah?" he said, walking into the break room.
"Yes, Mr. Dobson?" Deborah asked.
"I need to speak with you in my office when you get a chance." He smiled when her eyes went wide. "It's nothing bad. I just need to go over a couple of reports with you before the meeting today."
"Oh. Sure, Mr. Dobson." She said. "I'll be there shortly."
Joseph nodded and walked back to his office, hurrying before anyone saw his excitement.
He tried to busy himself with work, but he couldn't think straight. Corduroy ruled his mind. He was glad that he normally kept the blinds to his office closed. It helped reduce distractions while he worked. Now, that would work for another reason. He just kept thinking about those pants and what he wanted... A knock at the door brought him out of his revery.
"Come in!" He yelled.
Deborah opened the door and stepped into his office. In those pants. "You wanted to see me, "Mr. Dobson?"
Joseph had to fight to get his eyes to raise from her legs. "Yes, Deborah. Please have a seat." He searched through his paperwork as he tried to find something to talk to her about, but he came up empty. After a couple of minutes of frantic searching, he gave up. "Deborah, I didn't bring you in here to talk to you about a report."
"You didn't?" she asked, tilting her head a little. "Sir, is this going to be one of those 'promotional opportunity' meetings I've heard about? Where I have to 'show you what I've got' to move up in the company?"
"No! No." Joseph said. "Well. No. Um." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Deborah, I want your pants."
"Well, you can't get into my pants." Deborah said. "You think I'm that kind of...wait. What did you say?"
"I don't want in your pants," Joseph said. "although you are a very attractive woman. I just want your pants. Corduroy has always...done it for me, you know?"
"That's...that's weird, Mr. Dobson." Deborah said.
"All I'm asking is if I can...you know, 'use' your pants." Joseph said, actually using air quotes.
Deborah looked at the floor and thought it over. It was definitely a strange proposition, but this was her boss. He wasn't putting pressure on her to do it, but it might be good for her career. If nothing else, it could be good blackmail fuel for later.
"Okay," she said. "But only on one condition."
"What's that?" Joseph asked.
"That I be in them, when you...do whatever you're going to do." Deborah said.
"Oh. Um. I guess that would be okay." Joseph said in confusion.
"Great. Uh, what should I do?" Deborah asked.
"I...I don't know." Joseph said. "I've never done this before. I mean, with a woman. I mean, a woman wearing pants. I mean..."
"Okay, stop." Deborah said. "Come here."
Joseph walked over to her and stood in front of her, still unsure of what to do.
"Do you want you pants up," she asked. "or down?"
"Down, please." Joseph said.
Deborah reached up and undid his belt and unzipped his pants, pulling them down to his ankles. Her eyebrows went up, impressed by what she saw. She leaned back and spread her legs, pulling her to him. She pushed his erection down against the crotch of her pants and wrapped her legs around his waist.
Joseph closed his eyes and was in Heaven. With no prompting, he began thrusting his hips rapidly. The feeling of the corduroy against the sensitive skin of his erection almost made him lose himself completely. The continuous zzt zzt sound was the greatest thing he had ever heard.
"That's it. Fuck my pants." Deborah said. She pressed upward against his length over and over, stimulating herself as he drove against her. It didn't take him long to moan and empty himself all over her pants and the palm of her hand.
When he was done, Deborah grabbed tissues off of his desk and wiped herself off as best she could.
"Thank you." Joseph said quietly, his head low in shame.
"Mr. Dobson?" Deborah said.
"Yes?" he answered.
"I know where I can get a corduroy bra." She said as she cupped her breasts. "Should I wear that tomorrow?"
Well, I'm not sure how well I did. You'll have to let me know.
Special thanks to my friend Jonah for the suggestion of using corduroy. I'm guessing he's speaking from experience.
So, what's on tap for tomorrow? Let's find out. My lovely assistant has drawn:
22. Transcribe the strangest and most troubling wrong number phone call you can think of.
Well, if the murder entry wasn't disturbing, this probably will be.
That's going to do it for today. Thanks for joining me and I'll see you tomorrow. Until then, take care and be awesome to each other.
#WWWYKI
No comments:
Post a Comment